Leanne's post on happiness really got a lot of us thinking and sharing. It seemed some people were coming at the subject from different perspectives, and perhaps thought they weren't on the same page. Disharmony on the happy train. As I read those comments, however, they didn't seem to be opposing opinions. Perception is everything. To me, there was a lot of agreement, at this center point of happy, but it was found by many from different starting points. Like a magnet, all those fragments drawn together.
Sometimes our interpretation of others is filtered through our prejudices or compartmentalizing or insecurities or life experiences in a way that we are unaware. There are people in my world who inspire a bit of fear and in whose presence my guard is up and on high alert. Anxiety ignitors. Of course I am the actual cause of those feelings, whatever it might be in my head that colors my view of such a person. What power I "give" those folks who have fueled my dart and avoidance tactics! And there are those people for whom I have great admiration, love, or envy. Awe inspirers. Neither sort is a proper summation of the heart and character of the beast/beauty. My understanding of you, my impression of you, my connection to you is completely within me, from my place here in this world, with all my 33 1/3 years of living (okay, so its a bit more than a third, more like 2/3, but I like to squeeze in t'irty-t'ree an' a t'ird where ever possible) between my eyes and your person. In this way, it seems life must always be some shade of gray, rather than black and white. Except that it is certain there is no certainty to the shade.
My hope is to accept with no judgement. Oh! It is challenging at times, since it is difficult to control you if I can't shove you into this perfect little box I've spent a lifetime preparing. Last Sunday I was tested in acceptance. I was physically displaying resistance--deep breathing and rubbing my brows, but mostly "just as she is" was good enough. She is part of a five-petal flower and so am I. She is my sister. She approaches every day with more years of life than I, and from a completely different attitude and launch point. We are attached to the same stem, but it looks different from her side of the flower, the shadows fall across us at different times and at the same time and change our colors. As far as I can see, she is always there in her spot, and our connection is consistent, and true, from any angle. Her version of happy is just as valid as mine.
What is your perception filter? What are your classifications of the people in your world? Why is it some folks can be accepted as is, while others are in need of change? Where is the line? Is it a chalk or paint line? Why do I want to change the way "people" do the dishes in my house? Is it the same kind of rules? Your kind of happy, your brand of tp, your level of intellect, your fitness routine, your you?