Pretzel sticks and diet dew

Late night whispering of life's events, early morning bathroom haircut, Walmart runs, beach, sun, endless conversation.

Oh! What a week.

Peaceful hearts for you my friends!

day 2, motion

swim lessons.

.....

today i cancelled my netflix and the internet on my phone.  i started making a list of things to sell, and i even priced out a few things: our granite lazy susan, my finnish table ware, the car dvd player... and planned to add some daytime hours to my salon schedule, as well as a regular chunk of time each week for creative endeavors, mainly sewing.  i'm serious.  because i am so happy and fulfilled when i am busy and when i can pay my bills on time.  do you want to buy anything you've ever seen from this house? i was even thinking about trying to sell our bed frame and the vintage sewing machine upstairs.  and the kids' dressers.  and half our clothes.  and the music table thingy.  maybe the double stroller?  i want more space in this house and more breathing room in my checking account.  i want to stop treading water and start...SWIMMING!

happy wednesday to you fishies!!

LOVE.

daily routine

600 with 6 days and a wedding ahead.

Dear Photo Challenge,

I hope this letter finds you well.  You have really been a force in my life this month.  You've led me to a bit of blog stalking, nudged me to follow instruction (and not entirely abandon or buck protocol), and moved my monthly photo total from 250 to over 600.  It's shocking.

I have come to enjoy and look forward to each day's challenge.  You have moved the energy in my brain from the back to the front.  Right there above my brows and behind my bangs, there is activity.  With your simplicity and palms-up, one word direction, I found myself moving from self-doubt and insecurity to contented, curious, ease.  I am beginning to recognize the weight of a camera in my hands again.  Increasing my aperture.

Thank you, Photo Challenge.  I shall savour these last few days of March.

Regards,
Ethiopifinn

day 25: sunflare.

day 26: something old.  this something old was my grandmother's.  march 26th is her birthday!

i might give it another go tomorrow.  i don't like that shadow from the kitchen light.

day 27: after dark.

why DID the chicken cross the road?

to show the raccoon it COULD be done.
(ba-dum dum)

• today's banana bread is okay, but it got a little "done" on the ends and edges.
• i remember not liking coffee breath on adults when i was a kid
• suvi just told me my breath is gross
• nothing like the honesty of a daughter
• the last few days i felt like i was edging closer to the brink than i like to be
• last night i cried on my husband's shoulder
• today my mom watched the kids and the vip so i could run to use my finnstyle groupon before it expired
• i love marimekko
• and aarikka
• why don't all banana bread recipes call for 3 bananas
• 2 bananas is not banana-y enough for me
• i nearly fired a client this week
• either i got over it, or chickened out--not sure yet
• pretty sure i'm not over it
• i just brushed my teeth so my client won't have to suffer as suvi did
• my clients don't realize how much work it is to be the fabulousness that i am
• it's better if there is a little mystery and magic surrounding your hairdresser
• especially if i am your hairdresser
• sometimes it's okay to say hair stylist, like all the time, but please, not beautician
• the vip is vocalizing
• that's what i call it when i know she is talking, and to me, but i have no clue what she is saying
• i finally finished reading the glass castle at 12:37 this morning
• i'm really glad i don't have to sleep under a tarp because of the leaky roof/glad our roof isn't leaky
• i'll get back to cutting for stone tonight
• back in the day it was common for me to be reading two books, going for one over the other depending on my mood
• i enjoyed having options for my reading
• maybe part of the reason i had two books started is i couldn't find one book or the other at any one time, so i read whichever book i could locate
• i have been using one of those little led touch puck lights to read in bed
• theo is sick, we've been using his neb a few times yesterday and today
• when he was napping yesterday suvi built him a little tower, she told habtamu it would make theo feel better.
• so sweet! too bad he knocked it down immediately upon waking
• off to bed, sleep helps to ward off the quick sand of tired.  ever notice that? get good rest, not tired in the morning.  really an amazing correlation!

well, the house is clean.

except for the upstairs (and the basement).  i had to let go of getting the upstairs all figured out because we did some deeeeeep cleaning.  (slash, ran out of time) mj (my ma) even pulled out the fine wood cleaner to get the yogurt and pudding off the dresser in my living room.  she don't mess around. 

my lofah and i tossed quite a bit of crapola out during the prep for our VIP. switched out the UGLY old bathroom light fixture.  even painted our living room.

we did the east wall somewhere between these two photos.  behr magic spell.  and a cream color on the other walls.  sweeet.  no more suvi artwork-for a few days, until she finds the crayons again.  or a marker.  she's flexible in her graffiti.  also, she likes to fluff.  that's what she calls it when she uses the swiffer duster.  as in "mama, can *i* fluff?  i want to fluff now."  yes, my love, you can fluff.

there's a new rug in the living room.  it's an indoor/outdoor, not too scratchy!  i was taking a photo of the old rug to maybe put on craig's list, and these two kept darting in front of the camera.  had to indulge them.  stinkers!!!

 i scrubbed that shower at least five times since we moved in. ;) i tried scrubbing bubbles, lysol, baking soda, vinegar, regular old lime away, boomtastic, fantastic...nothing would budge the build-up. 

eew.  was it really as bad as this picture? ish.

 until...clr BATH and KITCHEN.  dude.  it is a strong chemical, but it totally changed my life.  seriously. because, five years we've been here, and i've hated this shower every time i have stepped in it.
this week i worked on the walls an hour or so at a time.  last night h's sis helped me by scrubbing the tub. we used this scrubby thing.  soooo much better.  i love it.  i was sweating scrubbing the shower walls and she was right there in the tub with me workin' it. 

before finishing the shower, tho, Auntie A watched the kiddos and Husband H took me on a date.  we drove to Smashburger, vetoed it even tho i have a groupon for the place, even tho the food is pret.ty yummy.  wasn't in the mood for that kind of chairs.  as if you aren't that picky. sheesh.  considered heading out to plywood for a little wild wings action, but we *might* have been there the night before with the kids.  what.  it was a holiday weekend.  practically vacation.  waiting at the stop light on winnetka and 55 still debating where to eat...when the light changed...friday's.  i know.  we are all about the chain restaurants.  i like predictable sometimes, because the rest of life surely is not.  :) and yes, ann, i did get a burger and fries. there was avacado.  does that count for some variety? heh.

auntie A and her sis always help me so much over here...they don't read my blog, but THANKS A & M!!! (not the university)  there were some finishing touches to be done around here today and then...

about 4:00 our VIP landed.  h's mother! it's been 4 years since they have seen each other.  i couldn't help but tear up.  all day.

it is a wickedly long trip, 23 hours of travel time. today is the first time the kids and i have been able to see her.  i am so so so happy she is here.  one teeny problem: we don't speak a common language.  

berlitz should add an amharic lesson to their language tapes. (oh, wait. they do have lessons available  i meant to say rosetta stone.) for ME.  what a wonderful Monday!!!!

well, that shower is not going to clean itself.

As per yuge (usual?), I am shirking my plans of attacking this house.  It's like that paralysis I mentioned a while back: it's as if the anticipation of the task steps on my chest and won't let me up.  Ooh.  And then, a foggy, boggy net encapsulates my brain, so thinking even becomes near impossible.  And then a huge vat of glue pours itself on my backside, so that when I sit in order to muster some gumption to start or continue my POA (plan of action) or IA (intended agenda), my butt is stuck to the chair.  It must be Gorilla Glue.  They are always bragging how much stickabilty is has.  Today, I'm not in labor, about to squeeze a VW through a tunnel the size of a manicotti, or laboring over a paper about the darkness of scandinavian literature.  I have to finish cleaning my house in prep for our aforementioned VIP. 

Now I get why people like to keep things organized and tidy.  Less angst.

part of the switcheroo mess...

it takes all kinds.

i'm pretty lax, as a rule.

natural is good, not-so natural is good (if we're talking haircolor).

eating dinner out for a date is wonderful, eating drive-thru in the car with the kids parked in the shade is wonderful.

dark denim jeans are hot and my favorite thing to wear with a cute tank top.

black yoga pants are not hot and my favorite thing to wear with a regular tank top.

eating meals at the table is a really good practice, and keeps the living room clean.

i'm pretty lax on that rule.

it does create some messes that would be better contained to the vinyl flooring in the dining room.  and more hand prints on the living-room everything.

a couple of weeks ago i was talking about a long-time friend with her sister.  it was more about the difference in parenting between the two sisters, and the long-time friend sets her kids up with little trays for breakfast, instead of at the table.  i totally understand this concept of parenting.  it's called, do what works best to keep your head on straight.  the conversation just popped in my mind this morning and made me giggle as i was carrying three bowls into my living room.  i can imagine the shock and dismay for some parents at this style of serving our kids.  it works for both of us, my pal and me.  motherhood: it takes all kinds!

(we do eat meals together at the table. and we do eat meals together in the living room.  i know.  we are nutser than you thought!)

a risks-it, attacks it, green and yellow basket

there's been something on my mind of late, well, a bunch of things, truth be told, but this particular thing was first on the list.  i had to tell my heart temperature to a group of people.  no one was forcing me to make any declarations, but in my head and in my gut i knew the climate of my heart had to be revealed, all jokes aside.  i told them how much i care about them, how big i want to spend time with them, and that hopefully we can meet up in the spring.  (oh, did i say spring? because i was thinking spring.)  i realize one omission, however.  didn't seem to mention that there are two huge reasons why i hope they'll see me in the spring, rather than this fall:  we're having a VIP to stay for september, maybe more, and, i really don't have any moolah set aside right now.  that small reason is a really big reason, but the first reason is the main reason why i can't be gallivanting around the midwest in the coming season.

so i went right on ahead and said it first.  "Youse are super fantastic."  the whole conversation had been on the back burner; tonight, i just had to clean the stove top.

in preparation for the aforementioned VIP, we are in the midst of a house-al overhaul.  we're moving our bedroom upstairs, making our current room into the guest room.  the upstairs is our toy disaster zone.  i am determined to sort all those various sizes and shapes and make definite homes for them in the kids' bedroom.  we're painting the living room.  one wall done.  i have to declutter the kitchen, this computer desk, my purse...heh, heh.  i've done a really thorough job decluttering the checking account, so that's good. er, wait.  anyhoo, this house organizing and minimizing is a rather overwhelming task.  i'm sure i'll be up until 3 am the day before our VIP arrives.  which will ensure some lovely dark circles under my eyes, detracting from my voluminous chins/cheeks.  see? everything has it's purpose.  oh yeah, i need a new shower curtain.  the green one is ripped.  the hubbinator and i are going to try figure out how to put up the new light fixture in there, too.

OOH! my head be a jumbled!  my whole point is, i'm happy i told who i told what i told.  it cleared the way for me to think about this pressing matter of all the matter of facts within these four walls.  i got a lot of cleaning to do, lucy.

all the buzz

yesterday when my Mom came over, she thought something flew in with her.
four hours later, after she'd gone home, suvi spotted a wasp in the living room.  i opened the front door to let it out, suvi went to get the broom, in case we needed to encourage that bee towards the exit.
this is what we found between the storm and front doors.
sigh.

now i have to do something about it...we'll do some figuring and purchasing today, and when the sun goes down, there is going to be some removal going on around here!

pto is magical

Big Daddy took the week off, so...I'll be busy with tending to his every need and whim.  Not blogging.  Much.  Not to worry, I'll be back soon enough!

He was in need of a nap, poor fella.  This one is straight out of the camera, and the second one is monkeyed with on Picasa.

I wonder if my Sugar Boogar will be doing more of this.  And I didn't say a thing to him about how the ladder was resting on the gutter, or at a precarious angle.  That's okay, Girls, I already patted myself on the back.  I feel like a Queen when he does these husbandy, home-owner things.  Truly.  I feel cared for and warm-n-fuzzy.  (OOH! I wonder how 'Acts of Service' rated in my love language quiz?)

My Mom is the master gardener around here.  I hope the kids don't up-end what ever it is they helped her plant in that boxy thingy.  Theo totally would, you know.  He's a rascal and a dickens.  Lucky he's so cute.

Don't have any fun or blog anything juicy while I am away from my desk.  I hate to miss out!  XO

growing out

It is just part of my charm that I think so hard and long about...myself.  And what I have been thinking about for the last 18 hours is, why did I cut these bangs, I'm so over them, it will take 4 months for them to be long enough, which will be May, and by then, the rest of my hair should be good and long and maybe then I will be happy with the length and cut.it.off.

I am serious.  I think of my hair quite often throughout the day.  Do you?  Is there something about yourself you sort of obsess over? 

I also think about food/baking, money (yesterday I sold clothes and books and brought $18.78 to the bank. yeah, baby! i'm in the big time!), and rearranging the furniture, a new layout for our house, winning the lottery, a minivan, and a vacation (the destination varies).  I've been hard pressed to post a good FB status lately, but any part of this post would seem to be very Facebooky.

Theo is begging to go outside, so I GUESS I will take him out.  Suppose I better change out of my capris.  I also dream/think/wish for a fence, so I would feel comfortable letting them go outside without me from time to time. 

So, what do YOU want, and WHAT do you find yourself thinkin' on today?

summations and goals are for geeks.

are you checking off all that you accomplished and experienced in 2010? are you mapping out your plan of attack on 2011?  have you resolved to be the change you wish to see?

MAlarky.

Lets just go back to the easy breezy-ness of childhood when the seven days between Christmas and New Year's Eve was a hugely substantial chunk of time.  And you didn't plan out every moment for that week.  No, it was like waking up every day was magical, and remembering the newest treasure from your family or Santa lit your fire for the day.  And the box of sugar cereal I got in my stocking lasted forEVER!  Never mind that week, each day was a wide open opportunity, a large expanse of time, for enjoyment. 

Time just goes on along here in adulthood at quite a clip.  And I've been missing my blog.  And missing my outlet!  We've had more homeowner challenges...got the electrician coming at 8AM on Monday.  Hope we get our lights back.   When I talked to the owner of the company on Wednesday, I told him we'd had some work done last spring, and that Dave told me he'd done a temporary fix.  We need that 'CGI' outlet in the bathroom.  "You mean, 'GFI'?" OH! YEAH! Hahaha! ....  He didn't laugh. Well.  I do hair. Not electricology.  And stuff, so...my little brain has been busy.  And then I made that bread down below.  That took a good part of Friday...:) 

I turn the computer on with a plan to sit down and chill when the baby naps.  But then I figure I do just this one more thing, it'll only take 20 minutes.  I 20 minutes myself back to back and right out of the blog time.  Dang!  There is just plenty other things to do, it seems.  I've even been too preoccupied with my busy work to review with much thought the last year.  It was a greatly challenging year for me.  I'm not sure what I'd like to work on during this year, 2011.  (My first year of college started the fall of '93, which was also the start of Conan O'Brien's first show.  He had a bit, 'In The Year 2000', which seemed like an eternity away, I wasn't even sure that I'd live that long.  You know, to 25.  I simply couldn't imagine the change of century.  Anyhoo...)  Perhaps I'll work on sticking to my point.

I do actually like summations and goals.  And geeks.  I was just being defensive because I haven't gotten around to it yet. 

Judah's birth and Mom's heart attack were so hugely emotional for me; it is difficult to even remember the first 4 1/2 months of 2010.  Plenty of bright spots in the time following those events, despite my perceived fragility/road back to stability.  I'm thankful to be here, having survived.  Feeling the tug on my heart for the friends who are working with a new normal, those who lost a Mom or Dad. Some who've now lost both.  Love to you, as you learn the parameters of your new perspective.  Love to my dearest of girlfriends scattered from sea to shining sea.  Thankful to be trudging along on the narrow path, with your fellowship and Grace.  Thank you to those who shared supportive words and sentiments via this blog, facebook, texts and phone calls while I confronted my depression.  I am feeling much better, and wondering how much further I have to go before I get comfy again.  There are lots more moments of comfy these days. Phew.  For your friendship, concern, humor, curiosity, nosiness, opinions, wisdom, experience, creativity, sensitivity, generosity, and inspiration...I am humbled and grateful.

So geek me up!  What is the plan for Twenty Eleven?

down on the farm

We spend Christmas Eve at home, Santa fills our stockings while we sleep.  The kids woke up around 7:30 on Christmas morning, we started our Christmas morning with squeals.  It was a full hour before there was any whining or squabbling.  Thank you, Santa!  Habtamu gave me the camera that I've been lusting after.  I have to get back into thinking about my photos more...I've been having fun just playing around.  I usually have to pour over the manual when I get new electronics, but I just needed to feel the camera in my hands and get lost behind the lens.  Yes, I am a bit rusty, but it will be so fun to get loose again.

our tree is skinny.  like me in my dreams.

Theo got a bike for his birthday, and more tracks for Christmas from Ma and Dad. And blocks from Santa, who found them at the thrifty for a buck forty-nine.

Grammy gave Suvi an easel.  White board on this side, chalk board on the other.  She loves to color, and quite often on herself and the walls.  My Mom thought Suvi might be satisfied in expressing herself on the board; she loves it.  She also loves to use the markers on my dresser, her dresser, her brand new white vest, the wall next to the front door, and right before we left for Katie and Dave's, Judah.  Well, his white shirt.  See, I had planned to put a plaid flannel on him, but his chubby little arms didn't fit in the sleeves.  So I was thinking about what to toss on his little rolly polly sweet babyness while suvi was writing on her brother.  Markers have been confiscated.  No release date insight. 

There it is!

Look at all that color and the pretty lights :)

Dave had to feed Anderson's cows; he invited the kids to go along.  They were shy, so Daddy went, too.  Suvi rode with Auntie Katie.  Theo was thrilled to ride in the truck with no buckles.  I was happy to learn this after the fact.  This photo is from H's phone.

We had a Happy Merry and hope you did as well!  I've been mulling over some thoughts for posts... there just seems to be less time for blogging as of late.  What with all the snow and icedams and holiday prep and new work hours for Mom and Dad.  And watching Avatar.  Yes, I watched it.  Santa put it in my stocking.  (I usually find a few things for myself and put them in my own stocking.  This year I decided not to do it, and my sweet husband found a couple of flicks for me.)  Never thought I'd enjoy Avatar, but it was kinda good.  {Don't tell MOE I said that though.  I like to tease him about his nerdy movies.}  The other film (pronounced FILLum, like in England.) is The Godfather. Mafia movies. Fuggedabaadit. 

So the prezzies and the food and the family...all good.  One of my sisters had to work on Christmas, it was strange without her, but we were sure to be extra weird in her honor.

I didn't spend enough time thinking about the birth of my Lord and Saviour.  It is always in my mind, but the fun of everyday often takes over the reins.  "Long ago a star shone brightly, Leading wisemen from afar..."  It can be difficult to believe that God chose Mary to bring His Son into the world.  I look at Judah and think how did the King start off like this?  A helpless child, cooing and getting teeth, became the man on the cross...all for me.  And you!  "Joy to the world, the Lord is come!"

I've wondered if some people might feel themselves wanting to pull away a bit from my blog, or from me irl, since I've been rather open about depression.  I've wondered if some people think, in a way, that I am just making myself sick, just worrying, not trusting God to take care of me.  If you are reading this, and you feel some of those things...well, I am still the same person I was before I felt so burdened by depression.  I still pray and look to God for guidance and assurance.  "Blessed assurance, Jesus is mine!"  I'm not any stronger or less dependant on my faith because of depression.  I can't even put it into words to properly relay the way I felt and how I feel now.  Since I started my 'course of action', shall we say, it is easier for me to go to church.  I would just be so frustrated and angry with my kids for acting up, I couldn't stand it!  I think they weren't acting out so much as responding to the weirdness and crabbiness that had moved into their Mommy.  They were, actually, pretty naughty in church today, but it didn't put me out so much or ruin my day.  It was, after all, a beautiful day. 



insulation

we need better insulation in our addition.  it was the addition aeons before the dining room was ours, but the problem is...ice dams.  on the roof.  and the water drip drip dripping in my dining room.  boo and hiss.  we are headed to the big orange store that rhymes with foam peepo to buy some de-icing strips.  hope it works so we don't have to hire the dudes with blowtorches to come and melt that huge pile of ice away.