Back to the seasons of my youth...(Y'all should know I love my Dolly)
The youth of my household, and later on, down there past the cuties, a bit of reflection on my own cool self.
Judah has two teeth.
his brother and sister are nudists.
I believe this photo was taken either just before or just after the letter carrier delivered our mail. Ahem.
I feel as though I am learning a bit more about life, and myself this week. I'm having some realizations...things are not always what I first take them to be. And that we don't have to always "get it" on the first round, but it's good when we *do* get it. I failed/dropped out of my senior year at the U because of depression. I petitioned to go back and finish up, I signed a special contract to make a concerted effort in my classes and repair the damage I did to my GPA from not attending classes (I was in really rough and desperate shape.), but after just a few classes I could tell that I wasn't ready to do the required work so I withdrew for the last time.
I've been fairly open with people that I didn't finish my degree (Scandinavian Studies and Finnish language. What? It's totally practical.) However, I hadn't really admitted the fact that I let depression rule my life to such an extent. Until now. Now that I am in a season of healing, I can accept and appreciate the scared girl of 23 shutting down her university career. "I don't want to stay in the University setting. How many more papers can be written on Scandinavian literature? Ibsen wrote dark and depressing plays. The end. It is not a practical degree choice." Those things may be true. It felt so...unnecessary, so redundant, so pointless to write those papers about Icelandic Folklore.
Oh my word. I LOVED learning those things, and I especially loved studying Finnish. It was my favorite thing to learn! And I was pretty good at it. It was difficult for me to tell my instructor that I was dropping her class. She is from the part of Finland that I had visited those handful of times, and I loved her for it. Anything that made me feel closer to my first love, Suomi. But I sit here, tell you these things, not in a tone of regret, but with a sense of understanding. Had I not made that choice to leave the U, had I not gone to beauty school, I wouldn't be sitting here in my little house with my loverly family. Those dark days led me on a path to Habtamu, and that I am most happy and thankful for at this moment. Of course, like anyone, we have faced some challenges together, but we *are* together and he is a precious piece of my puzzle. I'm happy that tonight I can reflect on my college days, even the end of my college days, with some comfort and some gentle thoughts for that girl struggling out of her own dark shackles.